I'll be damned...

I was about to break my two-day tradition by blogging before 11pm...but alas, it was not to be.

My make-shift ashtray is filled up to its brim. Yet, I am too lazy to go empty it. Says alot about me doesn't it?

K's been pretty docile the past couple of days. He even didn't bother to mention about my crappy shooting style today. Kinda weird if you ask me.

I realise that given time, I tend to rub people the wrong way. Not sure why. Perhaps, it's the reason why I've been called a "social butterfly" by Zender. He called me that when we were still in Perth. Boy I miss those good ol' carefree days.

Met Tang yesterday after not seeing him since I got back from Canada. Man he's put on a fair bit of weight. Not to mention the fact that he no longer keeps his hippie hairstyle to cover up those bulbous jaws of his.

Not putting down what I was thinking earlier today, I've completely forgotten what I wanted to think about. However, I remember telling myself yesterday to think about self-confidence and to blog it today. After 20 seconds of deliberation. I think I'll not put it down yet. Talk about lack of it!

What am I in the mood for right now? A little bourbon coke would be nice except that I won't stop at "a little" so it's a bad idea. I tend to live in a dreamworld. I'm a dreamy sort of person. Everyone wishes their life was perfect. Even those with seemingly perfect lives. It's ridiculous but once a person gets what they want, they tend not to want what they've got.

Am I a deep person? Depends on your definition of deep. I tend to think alot about what's gonna happen when I die and spend about 40 minutes before I fall asleep doing so. Will I be reincarnated? What's it gonna be like? Will I die and go to heaven? or will it be just darkness and a complete loss of consciousness. Many people find solace to such questions in the form of religion. Mind you, I'm not a particular religious person but I worry about it alot.

I'm impressed by people with faith. Faith for which they believe that when they die, whatever their religious teachings offer will be what happens then. But lets not go into a religious discussion. There'll be no end to it. Besides, wars have begun because of religious intolerability.

I'd start a war for someone I love. I've never watched Troy and I'm not much of an historian but from the trailers, I gathered that the war (with the trojan horse) was begun because of love. It's romantic. Fighting for your love but has anyone ever considered the fact that the sun does rise the next morning? or the fact that sex usually ends up as a totally unromantic, messy affair? I guess that's why most, if not all romantic novels fall into the "Fiction" catergory in a bookstore. Simply because it never happens as it is written.

I must be high on caffeine. My thoughts seem to be drifting from one place to another; one subject to another. It's quite a possibility that I suffer from ADD (or better known as Attention Deficit Disorder) I can't hold a thought for long. Am I the only one that this happens to?

I may be unique but this should not be a phenomenon unique only to me. I'm sure that there are other people out there whom are like me. Went to Starbucks for a coffee with GMH today. All we did was talk rots but I do like to hear her speak. She's eloquent, she's got spunk and she's articulate. Traits that are hard to find in this society. Or perhaps, I'm too engrossed in whatever I'm doing to notice those qualities in others...it's hard to say.

I hope that we can be lifelong friends. Someone special is worth keeping as a friend. I wouldn't want to ruin the friendship by going any further. Much as I'd hate to admit, most of the time, a friendship that goes beyond, when the relationship ends, it has a tendency to break down and loose touch. I, for one, hate the idea of that happening so I'll just suffer in silence. I'd rather do so than to jeapordize any friendship I may have with that person. Afterall, it might be a passing phase, but I really doubt that that's what it is.

Well, I guess I've gone on long enough for today. Perhaps I'll remember to jot down my thoughts in preparation for my next blog. But then again, I might just give it a miss since I hardly ever carry a pen and paper around. One thing to note though is to remember to purchase an A'zone diary for someone. I suspect that the company might have since gone under due to the increase in online diaries but well, I'll give it a shot nonetheless.

FreeSpirit